Refresh

It's almost been a month since I came out to San Diego, and how the time has flown by! Once the students arrive it has been go, go, go, but such a great time of building relationships, growth and fun. I am blessed to have three wonderful girls to pour into while I am here. It's amazing the feeling you get when you've been praying for people you don't know and then you finally get to meet and get to know them. I have loved seeing how different they are, how much wisdom and insight they have in their thoughts and getting to have fun and hang out with them as well. Even though it has been a wonderful past few weeks I am seeing the importance of taking time to refresh. It's hard to pull away from things you love, but I have found that by not giving yourself a break those things you love can turn into things less enjoyable. I have realized that there are two areas I need to pay attention to when I am doing ministry related things. One is to see if what I am doing are areas that I am gifted in. When we put all our efforts into things that we are not gifted in it can be very draining and does not allow us to fulfill our purpose in the best way possible.Is what you're investing your time in giving you energy? or taking it away. Do you look forward to how you spend your time? or is it a chore that you go through day after day.  The second is that when you are in a place where you are using your gifts to not drain yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually investing in that. Sometimes it will take longer to recharge then we would like, but doing so will allow us to have a much more effective ministry. I enjoy having one on one time with people, hearing there stories and being a person that they can trust to come to with anything. Having people to pour into energizes me and makes me excited, but I can also get very drained from it if I'm not careful. I think I'm still trying to figure out how I best need to be recharged. I do know that I need to make sure I have people in my life that are there to invest in me. I am not the kind of person that needs to process my thoughts and emotions with multiple people, but I do need to have people I can go to in my life. I have been very blessed with friends that have been that for me over the years, some that have been around since middle school and some that are only in my life for a season.
Being on summer project is a unique situation in every aspect. Someone described it to me as a relational sprint. We have such a short amount of time to build such deep relationships that it can be challenging to balance. I love being here and the opportunities I have gotten being here. I hope that as time goes on I become more and more aware of what this means to refresh in my life to give glory to God in all that I do.

Overflow

I can't believe it has already been a year since I spent the summer in San Deigo on CRU summer project. As some of you know I decided to return to San Diego as staff this summer, and this past week has shown me that I wouldn't pick any other way way to spend six weeks of my summer. The staff get the opportunity to be  in San Diego about ten days before the students arrive. We have gotten the chance to spend time with each other and growing close in our community before the project begins. We have been having time together to dive into God's word, share our testimonies with each other and do all of the practical tasks that need to get done to set things up. After spending over ten hours today moving in  all of the items into the students living, I'm getting more and more excited for everyone to arrive.
It feels a little weird being on the other side of the project this summer. I learned and grew so much last summer and the leaders in my life last summer had a huge impact on that. When I look back at how the staff interacted and led us last summer it makes me feel inadequate and wonder how I can lead the way that they did. I am realizing more and more that I should not be focusing on what I am doing to be a better leader, but how I can grow in my own relationship with God.
It can be easy to focus on all the tasks of leadership without paying attention to your heart. We were not meant to continually pour out into other people without getting poured into. I can always tell when I rely more on myself than God when I'm leading. I feel drained and lose hope in doing a good job because I do not take time to get refreshed. This can look differently at different times, but it all comes down to making sure I take time to spend time with the God I am leading for. I want my leadership, advice and attitude to come from an overflow of my relationship with God. I want my heart to be so filled and aligned with Christ that I do not have to rely on  my efforts, but rather it coming naturally from my own relationship with God. I know this is not always natural and it is easier said than done. I hope that I will continue to learn this throughout the summer and that the students will as well, because they are all leaders, and will be bringing the skills they learn back to their own campuses.
I am excited to see all the God does this summer. Thank you to all that have been praying for this project. I think one of the most exciting things is to see all of the ways and people that are affected by prayer. I have been praying for the students and staff for a while and it is so great to see how God has provided and is working already. I can't wait to share more, but for now it's time to rest after a long day. :)
~Rachel

"If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever". I Peter 4:11

Wrapping Up

I hate to say it, but my time here in San Diego is coming to an end. Last Friday I had my last day at work, and this week we're starting to wrap things up. Monday we had a free day, which was nice. We got to spend some time enjoying San Diego and not have to worry about being anywhere for work or meetings. Today the project directors came back to close down the project. It seems like just yesterday they all left and the students took over the project, and now they're back to send us off. We will spend the next 2 days reflecting on the time we have had here and how we can take what we have learned and grown in back home. 

I am going to be sad to leave on Friday, I have enjoyed my time here so much. I was incredibly blessed with the job that I got and the opportunity to build relationships with my co-workers. I am so thankful for the girls in my small group. They are all so different from each other and have helped me see different points of view and learn to get a long, and lead with different types of people. I have loved living with the thirteen other girls in my condo who have meant so much to me in different ways. I have gotten closer to some more than others and I am thankful for the close relationships I got to form over the past 10 weeks. I'm grateful for the patience God has given to us all, as it's not always easy living with so many girls :) All of the leaders have helped us grow in our knowledge of how to be good leaders in different ways. Even though it will be sad to leave it all I am also excited to be going home and back to school. I have such great things to come back to. I have a family who has been encouraging and supportive through the whole summer, and truly want to know all that went on this summer. I have friends who I miss very  much and can't wait to spend time with again. I have a community at school that will encourage me and keep me accountable in what I am doing. I have people from this project that will be going back to school with me, and help me remember what I have learned this summer and help pass that knowledge on to others. 

Saying goodbye is not something I am a fan of. Leaving people I love and am used to spending time with during the summer was hard, and leaving the people I have gotten close to here will be hard as well. I've realized though that I shouldn't dwell on how hard it is not to be around everyone I want to at the same time, but to thank God for putting them into my life in the first place, and to express to them all how much they mean to me. 

I want to thank anyone who has read this or kept up with what is going on this summer, for those who have prayed for me and the other students on this project. What God has done in my life is only a small part of what He has done on this project as a whole. I am excited to start of the semester and see what it has in store. For now it's time to pack though, and maybe enjoy the beach for one of the last nights :)

Unashamed

Well as much as I hate to say it the end of project is coming up fast! I didn't realized how long it had been since I blogged, although it feels like it was only a few days ago. I put in my two weeks notice at work the other day which made me realize just how little time I have left here. The past few weeks have been great of course, I've been working, going to campus, we had our fourth of July outreach which was great and we got to invite and hang out with people from around where we live as well as co-workers of some of the people on project. It is great to see everyone reaching out to those around them and bringing them into our community. I'm sure people will hear this a lot from me when they ask me how project was, but I just love the community we have here, and I'm sure I won't fully appreciate it until I am not around it anymore.
We had an amazing women's time last week where we got the chance to share with each other what we are struggling with and how to help each other through it, because none of us are alone. It made me excited to bring that kind of community back with me to school, and to the women in CRU.
Our theme for this week is unashamed. We are trying to focus on being completely unashamed of the gospel. When you think about it at first it might seem weird, I mean we're here on a missions trip why would we be ashamed of the gospel when that is the reason we are here? When you think about it though how often do we sugar coat the word of God in order to please those around us. We may think "oh I don't want to offend this person" or "I want them to like me so I better not tell them that what they are doing is wrong" Sometimes we can be so preoccupied with being non judgmental and accepting that we forget to share the gospel completely. I can think of several conversations I have had in the past where I have been ashamed of the gospel. I want people to like me, that I don't want to  share what I believe if it is different from them. being intentional about talking to people this summer has really helped me become more comfortable sharing with people what I believe, and explaining to them how it is different from their views while still having a loving attitude towards them. When you think about it you have nothing to lose, and they have everything to gain. Christians have the privilege of salvation, and the privilege of suffering for God. If that suffering means being rejected by others, so be it. The rejection I have had on campus and talking to people in San Diego cannot even come close to compare to the suffering others have gone through. We are reading through Acts right now which is filled with people suffering for God. People like Stephen, James and Paul who were physically persecuted for what they believed in even to the point of death, yet still loved those who persecuted them asking  God to forgive them, and then getting up and continuing to share the gospel. They were truly unashamed of the gospel, they had an eternal perspective. When I think about the people in my life that do not have  relationship with God it hurts me. It hurts me to know that people I love and care about aren't living for anything that matters, and do not understand the brokenness of man, the love of God and the chance we have to accept that and have a personal relationship with Christ. What are we doing if we aren't spreading the gospel, building our relationships with other Christians and giving everyone the opportunity to have the joy and fulfillment that comes with following Christ? I am praying for us all to be completely unashamed of the gospel this week and to continue that as we go back to our campuses.

" For I am not ashamed of the Gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes" Romans 1:16
"For you have been given not only the privilege of trusting in Christ but also the privilege of suffering for him" Philippians 1:29
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Chosen by God, to be used by God

This past weekend all the women on project had the opportunity to go spend time together. We went to a camp about an hour away for the night. When we first went I have to admit I didn't have high expectations for it. Even during the talks  we had during the day I saw it as nothing different from our normal speakers and women's time during the week. My attitude changed though when the staff took us on a faith walk. They blindfolded us all and took us on a walk for about thirty minutes, stopping along the way to emphasize the women in the Bible we had been talking about for the past four weeks.  Tamar, who persevered in truth, Rahab who acted in faith, Ruth who was humbly committed, Bathsheba, who sought forgiveness and Mary who walked in obedience. All of these women were chosen by God to be used by God, just was we are. Being women of God we have great examples in the Bible to look at, and until now I hadn't spend a lot of time studying them. Taking this walk and summarizing all that we have been talking about was great, and encouraging for my own walk with God. I'm praying that all of us women here will continue to become all that God wants us to be, as women of God.
As we were walking throughout the camp, blindfolded, a lot was going through my head. I kept thinking about how the physical walk we were taking related to my walk with God. Even with the blindfold on I still opened my eyes searching blindly to figure out where I was. How many times do I search for the answers myself? trying to take things into my own hands and relying on myself. That night I realized that If I can trust a human being to lead me blindfolded for thirty minutes how much more can I trust a God who loves me more than anything and is the only one who knows exactly what is best for me, to lead me through my life. God will lead us. He will never leave.
I like to know what is in store for me. I like to know the long term plans for my life. I'm beginning to learn that I need to hold my plans with an open fist. So often I cling to my plans, not wanting to listen to God if He wants to change them. I want to be  prepared, to plan for my future in  a sense, but I want to make sure I am still giving complete control to God in everything that I plan for myself. Easier said than done, but watching God take away expectations I had has helped me realize I could save myself a lot of pain and trials if I sought His will before planning my own.
When we all got back to where we were staying we had a pleasant surprise awaiting us. The guys on project, who had their retreat earlier, had cleaned and decorated our condos. It was such a nice surprise to come back to and so encouraging to see the way they all stepped up to encourage and serve us. They also surprised us with a dinner by the bay complete with music and excellent service. It made me so thankful for all the great men on project. Their servant hearts and complete respect for all of us was amazing to see. It seems to be harder and harder to see those qualities in men during day to day life, so being served by them was encouraging to see.
This is the last week we have with the staff. It will be sad to see them go, and probably hard at first. I'm so excited to see all  the students step up and lead the project. If you could pray for all of us as we're working together, that we would be able to lead well and encourage each other through the next five weeks. I know it will be amazing and I'm looking forward to sharing how God uses the students here to keep making a difference.
~Rachel

Time Flies

Time has already flown by, it seems like such a long time ago that I got off the plane and joined these amazing people in San Diego. First of all I would like to thank all of you who prayed for me during the job hunting weeks. I found a job last Saturday at Belmont Park. It is kind of like an amusement park type of a place, and I'm working at different stands around the park. It is within walking distance of where I live which is great, I mean how can you complain about walking along the ocean every day for work? I have already been encouraged by the conversations I have been able to have with co workers as well as customers about the reason I am spending my summer in San Diego and what it means to be a Christian. I am hoping for many more of these conversations to happen as the summer continues.
We have also been spending one day a week on different college campuses around San Diego. I am going to UCSD for the past three weeks to talk to the students about what they think about God, and to share our beliefs with them as well. Many of the students are interested in gaining knowledge about Christianity and are open about what they believe, but lack the understanding of the relationship aspect of Christianity. It can get frustrating having people be so willing to have conversations with you, yet not wanting to follow that path themselves. I have learned that it is not my responsibility to save people, but to continue to spread the gospel and live a life centered around Christ, so that I can at least plant a seed in people's lives. God has control over it all and doesn't need me to save people, yet He has given me the opportunity to be used by him to spread his name and message to everyone I can. Even though it can get frustrating, I have found encouragement and excitement in the opportunities we have had to listen to people's stories, pray over people and see a want to learn more. Not every conversation goes well of course, but those that do make it all worth it.
Other than doing outreaches and working I get to spend time with some pretty great people. I am already sad that I will have to leave them at the end of the summer, but so thankful God put them in my life. The girl that is discipling me for the first 6 weeks has been amazing. She has given me wisdom, encouragement, challenges and friendship over the past three weeks and I am so thankful for her, as well as the other girls in my small group.
As I go into the next week if you could be praying for continued endurance in the busyness of our schedule, good conversations with the people here, especially the people I am working with, and deepening the relationships with the students here. God has already taught me so much, I promise I'll have a post about it soon, but I wanted to keep you all updated on the day to day life here before I forget :)
~Rachel

First Impressions

Day 5 in San Diego! This is the first chance I've had to get on the computer since I left so I thought I'd better catch you all up on what's been going on before I forget!
The first day is all kind of a blur. After getting up around 5 in the morning to head to the airport we spent the morning flying, the afternoon  checking in, unpacking, getting groceries, and then jumping right into orientation meetings. We are all staying in condos and hotels for the summer. There are 14 girls in my condo so it's a little tight, but I couldn't pick a better group of girls to live with I can already tell. One thing I've noticed already is how different this environment is going to be from anything else I've ever been in. When am I ever going to have the opportunity to spend 10 weeks with over a hundred other college students who are on fire for  God and want to spend the summer sharing with other people about Him and growing in their faith.
After we got split up into our DNA, small groups for the summer, we got a chance to spend the day getting to know each other on the beach and share our testimonies with each other. It is amazing how much quicker you can get close to someone after taking off your mask of "yeah I'm fine I have a great life". Reality is that everyone has experienced pain, loss, and has struggles they deal with on a day to day basis. In the hours we spent on the beach together the five of us got the chance to be open in this loving and accepting environment. As we sat and talked, sharing our stories, crying over each other's pain, and praying over each other to encourage and comfort I could tell this summer will give me the chance to share life, real life, with amazing people.
Thursday we started talking about evangelism and got the chance to go out on the beach and start to get to know the people around here. with over a hundred others going out that day there were some pretty awesome stories to come back and tell. Some people were automatically open with us when we started talking to them, sharing their honest views of Christianity and how they think people should live their lives. Others gave yes or no answers and did not wish to talk or get to know us. Overall it was encouraging to see the majority of people willing just to talk with us, and for us to get the chance to build relationships with the people we will be living around.
During the day for the past three days we have all been going out to look for summer jobs. Looking for jobs can be a long and frustrating process, as I learned from last summer. Right now I am applying at a variety of different places around where we are staying and will get the chance to follow up on them next week. I know that God has the perfect place for me to work for the summer, it's just hard being patient for it. One of the things we talked about in our small groups is that I need to learn to trust God before I am provided for. It is easier to see how God has provided in the past, but trusting Him with your future can be harder, mostly because it is completely out of my control.
As the next week goes along if you could be praying for success in job hunting for all of us, good conversations with the college students and locals of San Diego, bonding of the students on project, and energy to keep up with the busy schedule of the weeks to come. I am so blessed to have friends and family that continue to pray for me, and so many have been answered already, it has encouraged me to keep praying and asking for prayer for the things to come.
~Rachel